A crappy crabby experience

So few days back my friends took me to an undecided detour on an evening for a supper. After careful evaluation and debates, it was decided to visit a seafood restaurent. My cute Marathi friend just came back from abroad with a lust for sea food, which he used to hate before. So we went to this place which looked cheap on the outside but passably elegant on the inside. And we were the only customers there. So this aged waiter with a wide grin and a massive forehead comes to us and asks us for our order. We sent him back to discus our order. But he would keep returning every 5 minutes. So I guess, on his 6th visit we asked "whats special??"

Next thing u know we have an assortment of live and dead animals on our table to choose from, but we had crabs in our mind. So we were shown two types- one small orange kind and the other- a massive mud crab, that looked eternally beautiful. So obviously we choose that. Later we find out it costed us a buttload but whats done is done.

About 20 minutes later, we have a mesmerizing crab ghee roast in front of us and a few other stuff. I was luckily served with the claw. It smelled and looked devine. The only problem was- I had never eaten a crab before. My friends had but even they weren't extremely verse with braking the exoskeleton and picking meat out of it. So we try and try with little success. Now a waiter shows up and I dared to ask him to cut open all our crabs. It was daring cuz we all knew in our minds that we not gonna tip. We never do. :D

Even after that, it wasn't easy. So we decide theres no point in struggling with elegance and hence we bring forth our big tools- the hands obviously. In just five minutes, our hands are all red with spices, so our lips and mouth and we look like puppies playing and eating their colourful treats. In the process I also slightly cut myself but that didn't divert me from devouring every last soft tissue on that crustacean. We sat there and ate everything there was to eat. With no guilt, and no shame. With my hands and mouth all spiced up red, we knew we are being heavily judged by their staff. But we didn't have any thing to lose.

So theres only one claw left, and I was out of the race. And both of the other guys had their eye set on it. The war begins- words, taunts and curses. Untill stone-paper-scissor was used to break this giant dramatic lockjam. First round and someone cried foul, so it was done again and again. After the 3rd time, with a majority of win one of them clamied victory and I brought them their big claw piece. Its a good time to point out that we have been eating the same "appetizer" since the last two hours. That's when I dropped the whole crustacean head on the floor and another waiter ran to find it under our table and bring it back to us. Poor him that we didn't tip at all. :p

After cleaning our selves we comfortably paid our bills, with no tips of course, and walk out. It was a delicious experience but also embarrassing. And I am going to remember it for some time now. :p